Happy Halloween?

Some of you already know this, but out of all holidays Halloween is the lowest in my book. Yeah, I know.....a lot of you are booing me right now, but sorry. I dread Halloween. Maybe it started when I had 2 children within a week of this holiday. Try planning birthdays.....you know, finding spare days for parties, gift shopping amid all the orange and black stuff at the stores, worrying about what cakes to make when all your kids have been eating candy for a month solid, etc. Or maybe it started when I was born with NO creative talents whatsoever (including sewing). Or maybe it started when I married a man who considers Halloween decorations (lights, severed heads, scary-sounds CD, glow-in-the-dark skeletons, artistic pumpkin carvings) something to start getting ready months before October. I don't know. All I do know is that there's a whole lotta preparation involved for absolutely NOTHING!

So just to solidify my opinions, we had our ward's trunk or treat almost a WEEK before Halloween. Oh joy. (Can you say sugar high?) Then starts the, "Mom, I want to be (blank) for Halloween this year!" Obviously a costume we don't already have in our storage boxes, so we drag ourselves out to the constantly-busy party store to find a poorly made costume that costs the same as a date night. You then have to pray that Halloween falls on a weekend, so you don't have to deal with sugar-hyper, grumpy kids the next morning while you're dragging them out of bed for school. How's about all the donations the classes need at school for the "fall" (can't say Halloween) parties? When is old enough to go out in the neighborhood with friends and no parents and pray they get home in one piece? And who passes out candy by themselves at home, while the other walks miles to watch kids gather candy and visit with other tired parents? What does everyone feed their kids on Halloween evening? Do you feed them at all or just let M&Ms and Skittles be dinner? What does everyone do with tons of candy and how do you divvy it out? (I swear, if I look at another Butterfinger bar, I'll puke) Isn't it fun to wake up in the morning to your toddlers, with chocolate faces and fingers, on top of the counters getting their candy buckets from the fridge? Such nutritional breakfasts.

Hey, call me a party pooper.......I don't care. There's many other fun and exciting holidays and events throughout the year where kids can dress up, play outside at night, have parties and eat that if we did away with Halloween, no one would suffer. And to eliminate all the candy? What mother would complain about that?

I'm counting down the minutes until I can bathe children, remove makeup and colored hair spray and get them to bed without any candy clutched in their fists, put away costumes, take down the giant spiderweb in our front window along with the lights and gross things, recycle those rotting pumpkins and get everyone really excited for some REAL holidays!

(what kind of pie is everyone having for Thanksgiving?)